Wow, thank you so much. Its good to know other parents who have had similar scenarios and ended up getting through to the other side relatively undamaged.
Oh God knows I tried, for some reason I feel like a rahrah Christian because before I had a kid I did believe in God. Now after how they act, I have to say there is no God! I have really been thru some troubling times and I almost wish I had at least 2 out of 3 abortions. I’m sorry God 🙏
I was that difficult child once. I struggled with major depression, and now I’m the parent of a child facing his own mental health challenges—ADHD, depression, and anxiety.
My mom and I clashed constantly. We fought hard, I said things to her that I know hurt deeply. Back then, being grounded or having my car taken away felt like the end of the world. (We didn’t have cell phones to lose in those days!)
Reading your words reminds me so much of my mom. She loved me unconditionally, but she was also exhausted. At the time, I couldn’t see that. It wasn’t until I became a parent myself that I finally understood what she had been trying to do. She wasn’t being cruel or unfair, she was teaching me about boundaries, accountability, and consequences because she cared about the person I would become.
Parenting is incredibly hard, especially when mental health struggles are involved. There are days when it feels like nothing you’re doing is getting through. But from someone who has been on both sides of that relationship, I can tell you this: your daughter may not understand it today, but one day she very well might.
One day she may look back and realize that everything you did came from a place of love, and that you were doing the best you could to prepare her for a complicated and often difficult world.
Keep going. The work you’re doing matters, even when it doesn’t feel like it. You’ve got this.
Mom of 3 grown children ,10 grandchildren.I was lucky enough to help watch 8 of them from 6 weeks to age 5 while their working parents finished up post grad work. Nooo not all at the same time,thank goodness! Definitely been there,done that,own the T shirt! Out of 3 adults,my only girl has went thru enough adult therapy trying to figure out Why I didn’t know everything when she was growing up,?why I couldn’t figure it out? That’s disheartening for sure! Even tho you think your girl isn’t listening?it’s soaking in and your good intentions are heard,even if she punishes you with harsh words. About the time you’re ready to place her in the corner for a few years until she grows up some……she will turn around and surprise the hell out of ya repeating all the good you instilled in her. Sounds like you’re on the right track,you might have to be a bit rough spoken with hard truth every now and then. Mine accused me of abuse once,I said Hold On ,let me get ya the phone number at the PD of who you should call 😉. A lil challenge never hurts them You got this ! 💪🏻No judgement here.
Kids are awesome when they are babies but at about 12 years old they get real shitty and girls are the worst. You will at times wish you had never had them but if they have you some grandkids you will be as happy as the old lady in the show…I so promise you! 💜🥂✈️😎
Please realize at 18 they humble a little bc “if they want something they can work and buy it or ride the bus!” Be patient and society will teach them and smooth out those edges of attitude! You can do this! I’m 82 and it’s peat and repeat that every generation learns those same lessons!
Totally get your experience. And on the topic of phones. If you can, have someone she likes/trusts plant the seed that phones are like booze and hard drugs- except the pushers are corporations. Teenagers tend to be about control. Planting some seeds of paranoia about who is controlling who in her relationship with the phone might well be a valuable thing to do. Always remember, if you aren’t paying for the app, the app is absolutely selling YOU.
Believe me, I feel your pain. Been there. Still there. My advice: Take it one day at a time, don’t forget who you are, and remember there are good days ahead. Keep breathing my friend. She loves you even if she has moments when she doesn’t remember that. 💙❤️💗
There will hopefully come a point in the future that your daughter will know, truly know and understand, in the depths of her being, that the basis for your words and actions was and is your love for her.
Speaking from a personal perspective, I will say that it was tough enough being parent to a teenager prior to this electronics everywhere era and I wonder if I would have the ability to navigate teen parenting waters now. My respect to you.
I have two grown sons. Both engineers. Far more intelligent than myself. I took electronics away every night. I was called abusive. I made them both do community service. I was called abusive. I told both of them you cannot have a phone until high school. I was call abusive. I grounded my boys. I was called abusive. I told my boys I only have obligation to you until you are 18…then you can make your own decisions work and buy your own house but you are done living here and calling me abusive. I was called abusive by my sons their friends and their parents.for that one. Teachers loved me. So fast forward to Friday my younger most rebellious son during his teenage years, sent me a text that said this who just bought his first home at age 20…
Just got told by a customer that my parents raised me right. Thank you.
I melted…please hang in there you have three kids to raise to adulthood. Stand your ground even though it is small and shaky. Screw the labels Sir. They don’t matter when they are 18 year old adults. Your kids need to become constructive stand alone adults who can make it through this world.
Yes it's hard as hell. At least you have a wife. Many people( usually mothers ) do this alone and get zero credit from the world. Just critical judgements and gossip. Be glad you have a support in your wife.
Liberal dad, my heart aches for you. I was there 30 plus years ago. I know you’re doing the best you can under such trying circumstances. They can be down right cruel to the ones who love them the most. I’ll be thinking about you and hoping things get better. And soon!
Omg!!! I’ve never felt so heard
The rights they come up with!!
The part about not liking them at that moment!!!!
I wish either of my parents were as concerned and caring as you obviously are with your daughter ❤️
Thank you
Wow, thank you so much. Its good to know other parents who have had similar scenarios and ended up getting through to the other side relatively undamaged.
Oh God knows I tried, for some reason I feel like a rahrah Christian because before I had a kid I did believe in God. Now after how they act, I have to say there is no God! I have really been thru some troubling times and I almost wish I had at least 2 out of 3 abortions. I’m sorry God 🙏
Im so sorry
I was that difficult child once. I struggled with major depression, and now I’m the parent of a child facing his own mental health challenges—ADHD, depression, and anxiety.
My mom and I clashed constantly. We fought hard, I said things to her that I know hurt deeply. Back then, being grounded or having my car taken away felt like the end of the world. (We didn’t have cell phones to lose in those days!)
Reading your words reminds me so much of my mom. She loved me unconditionally, but she was also exhausted. At the time, I couldn’t see that. It wasn’t until I became a parent myself that I finally understood what she had been trying to do. She wasn’t being cruel or unfair, she was teaching me about boundaries, accountability, and consequences because she cared about the person I would become.
Parenting is incredibly hard, especially when mental health struggles are involved. There are days when it feels like nothing you’re doing is getting through. But from someone who has been on both sides of that relationship, I can tell you this: your daughter may not understand it today, but one day she very well might.
One day she may look back and realize that everything you did came from a place of love, and that you were doing the best you could to prepare her for a complicated and often difficult world.
Keep going. The work you’re doing matters, even when it doesn’t feel like it. You’ve got this.
Mom of 3 grown children ,10 grandchildren.I was lucky enough to help watch 8 of them from 6 weeks to age 5 while their working parents finished up post grad work. Nooo not all at the same time,thank goodness! Definitely been there,done that,own the T shirt! Out of 3 adults,my only girl has went thru enough adult therapy trying to figure out Why I didn’t know everything when she was growing up,?why I couldn’t figure it out? That’s disheartening for sure! Even tho you think your girl isn’t listening?it’s soaking in and your good intentions are heard,even if she punishes you with harsh words. About the time you’re ready to place her in the corner for a few years until she grows up some……she will turn around and surprise the hell out of ya repeating all the good you instilled in her. Sounds like you’re on the right track,you might have to be a bit rough spoken with hard truth every now and then. Mine accused me of abuse once,I said Hold On ,let me get ya the phone number at the PD of who you should call 😉. A lil challenge never hurts them You got this ! 💪🏻No judgement here.
Thank you so much
Kids are awesome when they are babies but at about 12 years old they get real shitty and girls are the worst. You will at times wish you had never had them but if they have you some grandkids you will be as happy as the old lady in the show…I so promise you! 💜🥂✈️😎
Please realize at 18 they humble a little bc “if they want something they can work and buy it or ride the bus!” Be patient and society will teach them and smooth out those edges of attitude! You can do this! I’m 82 and it’s peat and repeat that every generation learns those same lessons!
Thank you
Totally get your experience. And on the topic of phones. If you can, have someone she likes/trusts plant the seed that phones are like booze and hard drugs- except the pushers are corporations. Teenagers tend to be about control. Planting some seeds of paranoia about who is controlling who in her relationship with the phone might well be a valuable thing to do. Always remember, if you aren’t paying for the app, the app is absolutely selling YOU.
Believe me, I feel your pain. Been there. Still there. My advice: Take it one day at a time, don’t forget who you are, and remember there are good days ahead. Keep breathing my friend. She loves you even if she has moments when she doesn’t remember that. 💙❤️💗
Thank you.
There will hopefully come a point in the future that your daughter will know, truly know and understand, in the depths of her being, that the basis for your words and actions was and is your love for her.
Speaking from a personal perspective, I will say that it was tough enough being parent to a teenager prior to this electronics everywhere era and I wonder if I would have the ability to navigate teen parenting waters now. My respect to you.
Thank you and I am sure you could.
I have two grown sons. Both engineers. Far more intelligent than myself. I took electronics away every night. I was called abusive. I made them both do community service. I was called abusive. I told both of them you cannot have a phone until high school. I was call abusive. I grounded my boys. I was called abusive. I told my boys I only have obligation to you until you are 18…then you can make your own decisions work and buy your own house but you are done living here and calling me abusive. I was called abusive by my sons their friends and their parents.for that one. Teachers loved me. So fast forward to Friday my younger most rebellious son during his teenage years, sent me a text that said this who just bought his first home at age 20…
Just got told by a customer that my parents raised me right. Thank you.
I melted…please hang in there you have three kids to raise to adulthood. Stand your ground even though it is small and shaky. Screw the labels Sir. They don’t matter when they are 18 year old adults. Your kids need to become constructive stand alone adults who can make it through this world.
No quitting here.
Yes it's hard as hell. At least you have a wife. Many people( usually mothers ) do this alone and get zero credit from the world. Just critical judgements and gossip. Be glad you have a support in your wife.
She and I are a good team. I could not even imagine how hard it would be without her.
You sound like a great dad to me.
Liberal dad, my heart aches for you. I was there 30 plus years ago. I know you’re doing the best you can under such trying circumstances. They can be down right cruel to the ones who love them the most. I’ll be thinking about you and hoping things get better. And soon!
Bless you and your family. The people that really count know the sacrifices you have made. You are not alone. We wish you the best.
Thank you